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Nice guy syndrome

I want to talk about the “nice guy syndrome” today because social conditioning often inhibits both men and women but today, we will focus on the “nice guy syndrome”.

Men known as ‘the nice guy’ struggle because they have learned that their desires are not ok and not welcomed by women.

They feel their desires are bad and should be hidden.

This starts with early social messages about not touching ourselves in a sexual way or shame around masturbation, or they are told they must be in love to enjoy sex.

This is obviously incorrect, but means a rather large proportion of men hide their real desire.

They become “the friend” and suffer because they feel they have to hide themselves, creating the opposite of connection and intimacy.

Learning that our desires are natural, good and welcomed by women if expressed in the context of consent it important to feel sexually connected.

This will help men with the “nice guy syndrome” learn to ask for what you want as a man and also express your desire openly, and learn to be ok with the fact that sometimes it will be welcomed and sometimes it won’t.

I am NOT suggesting here that men should impose their desire on to women without consideration for women’s boundaries.

We must always respect women’s boundaries and you will learn in other videos how to do this.

For now, I want you to realise your desire is one of the most fundamental and natural needs and an integrated part of being human, so you don’t have to hide it away and doing so will be a big disservice to your partner who likely crave you take initiative and express your desire for them.

Have fun and play around with expressing your desire, within consent of course.